Traumatic Time..The Grim Reaper and Back!

My boys breaking me out of hospital after four and a half weeks!

Mart the excellent packer,,,and no them conti pads are not mine!

The great escape!

Don't know quite where to begin with this 'episode' except to say its been pretty traumatic for all of us, and more so for family and friends who have been stoic with their support as part of the time i was 'morphed' out amongst the various pain killers, IV paracetamol is a treat as is IV morphine, and Entonox[ the gas and air stuff they carry in ambulances] well that is amazing stuff..everybody is just so attractive when your on it, even medics who are causing you surgical pain, Amazing!So I'm traumatized, I can feel a part of my emotional self sealed in a box and stashed away some where. So think that's why not been able to b log. so maybe for first attempt I'll list and bring you up to speed.It might be iggle piggley,

*Firstly lucky to be alive! Knocked on the grim reapers door for quite a while till microbiologist could 

 grow the bug that was stealing my life...they are the unsung heroes of medicine, I would not be here but for their skill and their tenacity. as to the medical staff at the MRI.

*Went in six weeks ago for five day course iv antibiotics for urine infection, Whilst in developed infection, temperature and pain in area above scapula, which developed into a strange mysterious lump, eventually had needle aspiration and visit to theatre but didn't find anything sinister .Sewed me up. medics still at a loss, More IV antibiotics. Discharged me!

First surgery!

Forty eight hours later admitted with acute cystitis, given iv antibiotics for seven days.Continued to get poorly, temperature, horrendous night sweats and very weak. Medics talked about all kinds  of stuff, polycystic kidneys may have to come out, toxic IV antibiotics which could damage my new kidney...they were at a loss. Think I was discharged for another twenty four hours when

I went back in as a medical emergency.The 'whatever it was' on my scapula was growing quickly, looked like a third breast on my neck![ next pics not for the squeamish, can jump past them.]

 Oh surprise, surprise me in casualty again!

Me very poorly but zonked on morphine!

* Eventually operated. this little beauty went right behind the scapula and to top of lung.Left me with open wound that now is being dressed every other day, as had to be sure not to seal any infection in.But we still did not have a diagnosis as to what was causing it and why I was continuing to be so unwell. Apparently found out recently they weren't quick to operate as there was a theory that there was a chance it was lymphoma, and if disturb lymph node it migrates to rest in body. As it was they had to take lymph node out and sent it to the microbiologists WHOM managed after some days to grow the bug....great excitement and jubilation's by medics, me...I still felt my ticket was numbered.

* Came up with diagnosis of atypical TB , which didn't like chests but liked skin and lymph nodes. Started some caustic IV antibiotics for short while then oral TB meds. Still having hot night sweats. lost a stone in weight now, spiking a temp,,but Marts kidney, god bless him and it just pushed me through fairly unaffected by all the drugs pumped through. So discharged...was that it....NO!

*Week after discharge got message from TB coordinator asking me to come in to see the Prof.Guess what... I don't have atypical [not full on TB] I have PROPER TB. The disease of consumption. Apparently I've inherited it from my dad , he died of renal TB but did have pulmonary TB as a young man, and even though I had the tests and immunizations when I was poorly in hospital when my white cell count went down to 0.8...pretty fucking dangerous, because I was so immune suppressed the TB came out to play! Pisser!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*So TB ...curable in most folk,the drugs regime is as close to Chemo as it gets,Its called Combination therapy.I feel like shit.The metaphors that stand out would be the Fray Bentus corned beef can with the wind up key, fully wound, and like someones spilt a packet of crisps on floor and when you stand on them I feel all that crunching like fractures in my body. Extreme nausea, its completely stole my appetite. lost another half stone last week.good job I was a fatty before this, but BMI holding up.Terrible.terrible night sweats and I smell chemically and that makes me want to heave too.Other people cant smell it but you know your own body smell.

*anyway green around the gills at clinic, so only have to go in once a week for blood, TB team suggest taking TB meds at night so may sleep through worst of side effect...my arse! Changed sickness meds So tonight is the third night, awake till 6 am, then doze for few hours but then manage to have an afternoon and evening.Its a knackering regime. Lost some handfuls  of my hair, my one vanity. but that's stopped now and had some bad blisters in my mouth ,which seem sorted, They have to monitor bloods closely as can effect anti rejection drugs and liver as can get jaundice. But basically this is the best regime and you just have to hack it...so very toxic dose for two months then if OK can reduce it for next four months then cured!Please God!.So on eleventh day of regime tonight.Poor mart has to sleep upstairs when hes working or else he'll be bonkers with sleep deprivation too.

Things to persevere with uncomfortableness for:

My amazing family,especially Mart ,Jen Jen and Pete.

My fabulous friends, old and new and the amazing inspirational folk I've met along the way,

My garden.

My life ,which is far from completed,

To all of you who have supported me with love,phone calls, texts, packages,cards, soup, freezer meals.cleaning.catching the threads I couldn't hold together,Healing, giving me the 'Get a Grip talks', the escape vehicles, the hand holding, the turning up at the hospital no matter what state I was in, the information,the bringing of flowers to the ward which were immediately confiscated..and still it appears to continue. I am held and humbled by you love, spirit and support...you know who you are......we did well!

PS.I AM NOT CONTAGIOUS!